The Anchor Of What’s Right – 2025 In Review

The death of a friend and mentor, a category 2 cyclone, delayed dreams, 46% life completion, and the foundational drive of what’s right – this is 2025 in review.

And just like that, the first quarter of the naughties is done. Most people feel like 2000 was ages ago because it was the start of three digit changes in the year, so the fact that we’re now 25 years removed from that is pretty rough.

2025 was an absolutely crazy year for me in the best and also some of the worst ways. I’m sure it was for everyone.

As usual in my years in review, I like to take a macro look at the year on things that affected everyone before zooming into some personal items from the year, usually identifying a theme underneath it all. So join me won’t you, as I reflect on the year that was and hopefully allow you to do the same.

It’s been a year where AI has really come into every day use for many people. For me it’s been in daily use in my career as well as in my personal life, especially with the latest models of Gemini and GPT. Gemini 3 has finally bumped the Google offering into something really awesome, especially now it’s not so afraid to tell you about news or current events any more.

No, this one wasn’t AI generated, and I have no plans to give anything a prompt and have it do all my writing for me. But AI is definitely here to stay and I’ve been making sure to stay across it as well as make sure the kids are staying across it too. I don’t think AI is going to replace people, but it is going to replace people who don’t know how to or refuse to use it.

In the first half of the year, the Catholic movement saw a new pope elected. I remember watching the feed of all the times the different coloured smoke rose out of the chimneys. Leo has certainly been a lot more politically involved than recent pontiffs, and although I’m not a Catholic, I do regularly find myself aligning with what he says about a number of topics, especially about the difference between pro birth and pro life.

In my state of Queensland, we had a tropical cyclone named Alfred reach all the way down the coast for the first time since the 70s for a system that strong. Schools closed, offices were shut, and everyone braced for the 3-4 days for its pending and delayed arrival, before it eventually swept through fortunately not causing as much damage as was originally feared, although still affecting a number of people.

What was a good takeaway from that was that many of us didn’t think our storms were built for a storm of that size, and yet thanks to Alfred a majority discovered their homes were stronger than they thought.

And if the home you didn’t think could survive the storm was stronger than you thought, then maybe you yourself are also built to survive the strong storms that have come your way. If you haven’t done your 2025 in review, that’s an easy starting point at least because that applies for all of us.

Something else major in the world stage was that a certain someone returned to the Presidential chair in the United States, and thanks to the strong ties and connections every country has with the US, it was like every day was another huge event in the economy or the world society. I don’t think I’ve kept it a secret that I really don’t like Trump, and I really don’t like Christian nationalism, and I really don’t like the way especially immigrants and refugees were treated this year internationally, especially by people who claim to care. I think I wrote more about those It’s Crazy That Trump Is Running Again… Right? and Why Does Your Version of Jesus Ignore The World’s Pain?

With the release of the Epstein files, we might not need to worry about that too much longer. We’ll see if the base that elected a 29 convicted rapist will also find an excuse for paedophilia.

There were some utterly amazing movies and games that came out this year. For me the absolute highlight in the entertainment space would have had to have been the majestic Clair Obscur: Expedition 33. Truly one of the greatest achievements of our lifetime. I love all the varied roles Andy Serkis has had in his film career, but I think his role as Renoir is my all time favourite, not to mention Ben Starr and Jennifer English who have their career sorted for life from here. More about the game that made me ball my eyes out every time I played through it in Clair Obscur’s Mental Health Masterpiece: Dysfunctional Family Dynamics and Game Review. Even if you’re not a gamer, you should at least watch a playthrough of this one. And to think I had just updated my 24 favourite games list before this one… I guess it’ll have to be 25, with Clair Obscur somewhere in the top 4 for sure.

Zooming in a bit further, my city of Brisbane survived the storm and several other big ones this year. I think the number of hailstorms we’ve had already accompanied with the cyclone has been enough for most deniers of climate change to change their tune, as our city has definitely experienced a paradigm shift in this regard.

We’ve had a number of infrastructure projects continue or complete this year ramping up to the Olympics, as well as the first full year under the Crissafulli government. 50 cent fares and $2 dollar dips at the pools have meant I’ve definitely noticed a lot more other families out with us enjoying all the amazing places to enjoy in our city. The Star went bankrupt and then didn’t and then did and then didn’t and continues to be a iconic spot.

Zooming in even further, little ol me turned 37 this year. Based on average male life expectancy in my region, that means my life is 45.96% done. As I wrote about in my review of last year, I’ve definitely felt myself shift into that middle age mindset and experience. I see it as a gear change – a bit of a step back in some regards, the speed drops a bit initially, but the higher gear allows for a higher potential maximum speed and more opportunities. I think a lot of us really struggle when that gear shifts and we don’t always adjust well. My hope has been to hopefully adjust well. If you’re a regular reader, of which there are many and I am very grateful, you’ve probably noticed there’s been more gaps between my writing this year. That’s something I’ve felt drop down in the gear shift and hoping to speed back up as the acceleration continues to happen.

One thing in that shift is I’ve been trying to focus on getting things right that I haven’t been as good at in other areas. In 2016 I got really sick and put on a whole bunch of weight that between work, pandemic, parenting and other factors I have struggled or found excuses not to lose. However this year after trying multiple approaches I found a winning combination of high protein food, lower calorie versions of the same items, and an exercise pattern that works around young kids meaning I’ve lost 10+ kilos and continuing in that direction. Alex Gamble and Zumba Sulu have been two really helpful resources for me and I’d recommend checking them out if you’re in a similar boat. I’ve also been upping my skin care routine which is something I’ve been a lot more blasé about in younger years. Grace Cosmetics makes some really good stuff for men.

I suppose in a lot of ways that’s been my main focus this year. I’m very happy with a lot of the success I’ve seen in my career, my opportunity, my leadership, my knowledge and learning, and in other areas, and with the hands of time moving I’ve felt the need to continue to turn into the best version of myself across the board, with the window of opportunity to get a lot of these things right closing more and more as the years move forward.

Dad life and married life continues to be a true asset, giving me easily all the best memories of the year. And no doubt also some of the hardest times too, as is the case for all of us. As the kids grow older I find myself more and more aware of the state of the advice many parents are getting across the board and an unfortunate reality that school age kids raised a certain way have become completely problematic and dangerous to their teachers. I have many teacher friends and even doctor friends who tell me about the things they see with children who have been conditioned not to listen that strongly, a lot of them bullying each other, not listening to instruction, or even hitting teachers without recourse.

I think everyone’s accepted rightly so that smacking doesn’t happen any more (definitely no smacking and never has been in our home) but bringing a balance of discipline and respect seems to have been dropped as if physical contact was the only way that this could have been achieved.

This year I’ve found myself going through more and more content from a wider variety of parenting resources and finding a path I believe works for our children. I think I’m ready to say, which I think I have always held true considering the last number of years, that I don’t believe in gentle parenting, however I do carry a lot of its tenets. For instance I love Dr Justin Coulson’s point about time in before time out – checking for needs and having connection opportunities before just blasting bad behaviour. But also age appropriate consequences, whether natural or enforced, seem to make a lasting difference to a child’s stability, safety, kindness and wellbeing.

Perhaps it’s more accurate to say I don’t agree with the image that comes to mind with the term “gentle parenting”, with a passive child-led approach. I believe and continue to find kids are looking for and/or need direction from their parents in addition to getting sufficient opportunity to practice and develop their own autonomy. Love, support, listening and connection, accompanied with boundaries and direction. Like roads and train tracks give context to vehicles, so too do our kids need to be shown all the safe paths forward while they discover the fuller direction for their lives.

I did like how one author put it in that kids and adults both need grace and truth, and one without the other is detrimental.

Add a very generous helping of beach trips, water parks, bushwalks, bus rides, board games, video games, shared building activities, family nights out, staying connected and doing life with many other people, weddings, birthday parties, and lots of listening and joy. I read a statistic that you spend 75% of your total hours with your children by 4 years old, and then 90% by 18 years old. The windows close and it’s so important that we can pour everything we can into them while we have our opportunity.

I think a core parenting attitude I have seen that I would like to call out is this – your children don’t exist for you. You exist for your children. I think every time I’ve seen a major struggle involving children, even grown children, it’s because people get in their heads a sense of entitlement about what these little lives owe them. But their birth and existence wasn’t their decision – it was yours. And every time a parent chooses their own entitlement over the wellbeing of their offspring, it never ends well. Not saying parents shouldn’t have their own lives and moments, but so many people pin so many of their hopes and dreams and emotional needs on these little lives when instead it’s up to all of us to ensure we ourselves are healthy, so we can then in turn pass on health to them.

I had a bit of a legal battle this year which ended up taking a lot of time and effort. Successful result in the end, but really exhausting and a looooooot of research involved. If you were a lawyer you’d be in that constant fight or flight state all the time, and I definitely felt that around a lot of this.

We’ve seen some great things happen in and around our life group this year. We love doing life with this group of people and watching their wins, their babies be born, their dreams come true, and their lives be supported through storms has been so rewarding.

I’ve continued to daily follow the conflict in Ukraine, and I continue to stand with a nation who has so bravely fended off overwhelming odds. Only 1% additional territory has been lost in the last 1000 days after successfully retaking over 10%, thanks to the bravery of many husbands, fathers, mothers, wives, and people. One day hopefully the abusive ex can realize the relationship is over and stop trying to rape someone who hasn’t been in their lives for 33 years. Slava Ukraine.

We had some property related goals that I had really been banking on this year after doing a lot of things to set ourselves up for it, but with the property prices, well, everywhere going nuts, some of those things are delayed for now. It certainly was a wrestle and a disappointment to have continued to make so many changes only for the goal posts to move so rapidly and to keep going. If you live in Queensland, or anywhere in Australia really, you would know. When 1.1 million turns to 1.8 in a matter of months, and townhouses go from 500 to 1.1m, it’s quite a shock. However, it just means the wind is blowing a certain way, and it’s time to adjust the sails. I know for a fact everyone reading this will be feeling in the same boat, or finding it even tougher with low property availability and a devastating rental market. I did read that Melbourne successfully curbed its rising prices by putting limits on AirBNBs, stopping houses and units being purchased to effectively charge 500 a night rather than 500 a week – maybe there’s something in that for other regions to learn from?

This year we lost a dear friend and mentor of ours, Krys. He was a driver at our wedding and regularly caught up with us to talk through life, marriage, and other things. He’d always call us or meet up for dinner with us and was just a valued presence and person in our lives. I remember one night this year I really just needed to talk to someone and he dropped everything to have me at his house for several hours and gave me some much needed validation as well as direction on paths forward. He was dearly loved and always will be. Soon after I visited him in the hospital after a major episode and realised this great man would be leaving our lives soon. Even in his rough state he was still laughing and joy filled, surrounded by so many people he’d helped and stayed in connection with that we had to stagger our arrivals so the ward wouldn’t be overwhelmed. He lived his life to the fullest and died empty. What a great example for all of us to follow.

You know I love learning about relationships and doing them well, and I think one of my favourite pieces of marriage advice he would say before he passed on was this – “Not who’s right, but what’s right?”. In addition to stay amazed, that’s now become one of my favourite and most helpful summaries of the wisdom of Scripture.

I think as the years go on, I continue to discover in practice just how important it is for we to matter more than me. We isn’t to the neglect of me, as me is a part of we, but we are the prime goal. As was true in our wedding vows and is true today – team work makes the dream work. Without the team and without the work, we don’t get anywhere. But two people continuing to build towards a shared future, being faithful with what each has been given, then we can see our greatest potential realised.

I remember one night this year where I needed a rain cloud. And a beautiful friend took 10 minutes and she spoke life and reinforcement into me that I’ll never forget.

I’ve certainly seen something in me this year, and probably in my writing as well, in that I have grown really tired with the lack of love and overabundance of triggered armchair criticism that many in my Christian faith continue to execute. I would have to say it’s largely driven by a dismissal of more mainstream voices and a dependence on independent, non-fact checked, unaccountable, angry, red pill nationalists who use the Christian label around viewpoints that aren’t Christian at all. I think a lot of Christians want two or three policies in their governments and they’re willing to compromise on almost everything else in order to see them made law.

The foundation of Christianity is that you are a sojourner who has done the wrong things and need compassion, love, forgiveness, mercy, opportunity and kindness to be allowed to be accepted as an immigrant with the goal of becoming a citizen of heaven. All of this is out of your own power to do for yourself. And yet who are the people who modern Christianity continues to ostracise, belittle, mock when political violence is executed against them? The least of these.

The parable of the sheep and the goats stands as a stark warning to all of us, including myself, about who we’re going to be when the least of these enter our lives.

With the pressure of the modern economy, people feel a lot poorer and restrained than they really are. And yet here you are, sitting there on an expensive device, reading content for free on an internet connection that you are able to pay for regularly, in your air conditioned comfort, with your big walls, your relatively full bank account, your stocked up fridge, without fear of someone busting down your door and deporting you because of where you’re from. As I am also.

And you can cast out demons, and be full of faith, and say all the right verses, and go to church every Sunday all nice and pretty. But at the end of time, when we stand at the door of eternity, the final test we need to pass is how we treated other people. And especially the least of these. The ones you prison, the hungry, the naked.

I read this week from the World Giving Report that the average Australian in 2025 gives away 0.68% of their income. Some people would call this close to 1%, but on the full scale of your income let’s call it for what it is – it’s close to 0%. We’re hoarders, not helpers. We’re stingy, not generous. We’re a nation who wants to stop the governments paying for kids’ lunches but refuse to put up even a few dollars of our own to literally feed the hungry.

Why on earth supposedly loving Christians are against taxes going to feed kids who don’t get food at home and continue to take away affordability programs from the family units these kids are also from is beyond me.

That’s probably why I really struggle with Trumpism. He’s an angry, vindictive, vengeful voice at too many Christian events, when he’s not even a church going Christian himself, all his opponents go to church, read their Bible, volunteer and serve more than he does, and treat the least of these with so much more love and kindness. He’s a rapist who likes Israel and doesn’t like woke or abortion so people bend over all sorts of violations of our faith to accommodate. And I am so sad to watch so many believers compromise on the most dangerous thing you can compromise on – your love for others.

And so I would like to continue to be a voice to remind you, myself, and everyone else – your love matters. It matters so much it affects your entire trajectory.

In honour of what Krys said and who he was, I realise the same advice applies even beyond marriage. Not who is right, but what is right?

We’ve all fallen short, and we all need love and mercy. Are you the one helping someone come inside from the cold, or are you the one slamming the door in their face?

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So there’s 2025. Q2 of the 2000s is now underway. I’m looking forward to acceleration in this gear shift. There’s definitely more great stuff ahead. And there’s a lot of work to be done for sure.

I want to be the best version of myself as I get older. I don’t want to get worse. I don’t want to become a bitter, angry old man. I don’t want to become insular and self seeking and shut off from the needs of the real world. I want to live eyes open, heart open, hands open, with wisdom, but in love.

How about you? How’s your 2025 in review looking? May you and yours find greatness in ever increasing measure as we roll into the new year.